The Surrogacy Language
As we have mentioned throughout out website, surrogacy has an incredible amount of information and can be overwhelming when you take the first step of researching. Outlined is some of the surrogacy terminology that you may hear more experienced experts use when describing parts of the surrogacy process and it is important you familiarize yourself with the basic concepts of surrogacy. I promise that it does get easier as time goes on, and soon you will be an expert yourself.
-Gestational Surrogate: Has NO genetic link to the baby. This type of surrogate becomes pregnant through In-Vitro Fertilization (IVF).
-Traditional Surrogate: A surrogate become pregnant by using her own eggs and through artificial insemination (AI) using the fathers sperm, which means the surrogate then has a genetic link to the child. *Healing Hearts Surrogacy does not work with Traditional Surrogates*
-Intended Mother: This will be the mother of the child that the surrogate carries.
-Intended Father: This will be the father of the child that the surrogate carries.
-Intended Parents: These are the parents of the child that the surrogate carries.
-Egg Retrieval: Eggs are taken from the intended mother or from an egg donor.
-In-Vitro Fertilization: Eggs which have been removed from the egg donor or intended mother are then fertilized with donor sperm or the sperm of the intended father and then grown in a lab for 3-5 days and frozen until ready for use.
-Embryo Transfer: Medical procedure where the surrogate has the created embryo transferred into her uterus.
Eligibility Requirements:
Between the ages of 21-45
Enjoy being pregnant and want to help another family
Reside in Idaho, Utah, or Oregon
Have a healthy lifestyle
Abstain from drugs, alcohol, smoking or anything that may harm the fetus during pregnancy
Have a healthy BMI (BMI lower than 33)
Have a history of healthy full term pregnancy
Have insurance
No state assistance
Have had at least one child who is your current custody
Financially stable with a stable safe environment
If married have a spouse who supportive of your choice to be a surrogate
Pass a psych evaluation
The Matching Process
At Healing Hearts Surrogacy we understand how crucial the matching process is, which is why we take this part so seriously to ensure you have the best possible journey. Finding the best match for you is emotional and personal and we make sure that we are with you every step of the way. Most intended parents are looking for a surrogate who is healthy (both mentally and physically), has overall views that are similar to their own, but most importantly they want someone who they feel a strong connection and bond with. The same can be said for you, that you want to also feel a strong connection and bond with your intended parents. You will interview with prospected parents either in person or via a Skype call. Jordyn will be with you during this interview to help answer questions and lead conversation. This interview is your time to show all your amazing qualities and personality, and to also ask important questions about your intended parents. This interview phase could take one interview to be matched, or more, but most importantly we want both parties to feel like they are getting matched with the best couple possible. It is important that you do not get discouraged if you are not matched with the first or even second couple you interview with. This simply means there is a better matched couple out there for you. Once a couple does choose you then you will be sent a brief biography of them and then get to choose whether you would like to carry for them. Once a match is made a contract will be drawn up and finalized within thirty days.
Counseling and Psych Evaluations
As a proven surrogate and a nurse I understand the importance of mental health on a daily basis and even more so when navigating a journey as complex as surrogacy, which is why Healing Hearts Surrogacy has partnered with Southwest Behavioral Health Consultants PLLC to offer mental health services in a variety of ways. Gestational Carriers are required to have an up-to-date psychiatric evaluation for clearance prior to the scheduled transfer date. Psychiatric evaluations will remain valid for one year. The psychiatric evaluation will not be released to the intended parents or any entity without written consent from the gestational carrier other than Healing Hearts Surrogacy.
Southwest Behavioral Health Consultants PPLC also offers optional counseling services available to Gestational Carriers during their journey and up to three months after birth, per intended parents/gestational carrier contract agreement. If a GC wishes to continue with services outside of the range and funding from the IP. Southwest Behavioral Health Consultants operates as an independent private practice and can continue treatment outside of this agreement.
What can you expect from a mental health evaluation?
Becoming a Gestational Carrier is a life-changing and beautiful decision to help another person become a parent, that should be made with great consideration. The purpose of an evaluation is to discuss the aspects of your decision, assess your comfortability and preparedness with the journey and post-journey of delivery. During the evaluation, topics include:
Reason for becoming a surrogate
Your feelings toward pregnancy, risks, side-effects
Your support system and expectations
Mental Health History
Substance use history
Current emotional state
Mental Status Exam
The evaluation is intended to help both the Gestational Carrier and the Intended Parents feel comfortable and supported in this decision. This is seen as an opportunity for Gestational Carrier’s to discuss your feelings, talk openly about any concerns or fears, and prepare for any challenges you may face. There is no wrong or right answers, this is not an interview, it is a time for you to be honest and up front to help support your journey. All evaluations will be performed by one of Southwest Behavioral Health Consultants licensed counselors or psychiatrists (MD).
Contract Phase
The contract phase has a lot of information, which means that it needs to be read over and thought through thoroughly. The contract will have rules outlined, and expectations in regards to both the intended parents, the child/children, and the surrogate. It will also have a detailed payment schedule, any and all fees you may receive and at what point you will receive said payments. Our fees are set by Healing Hearts Surrogacy. Compensation is $40,000 for first-time surrogates and $50,000 for proven surrogates. We require that everyone works with a lawyer who understand the ins and outs of surrogacy, which is why we have a lawyer we recommend for all contracts. You will receive a detailed questionnaire that will be filled out by both parties and will aid in drafting the contract. Once the lawyer has drafted the contract, it will then be sent to both parties for review. If there are changes that need to be made the lawyer will help in the negotiation until both parties agree on a final contract and then final copies will be sent to both parties.
Medications
One area that is not talked a lot about with surrogacy is the process you have to go through before getting to the actual transfer. You will be on medications to best prepare your uterus for the embryo transfer. This means that there will be a strict medication schedule and you will be required to take these meds via oral, injection, and suppository route depending on the clinics requirements. The shots can often time cause a lot of anxiety for first time surrogates, but as proven surrogates we can tell you that you quickly get used to the idea and it really is not as scary as it seems. The biggest part of the medication part is that you are responsible and take your medication exactly as directed by the fertility clinic, as this has a direct effect on your chances of becoming pregnant. You will take medications such as Lupron (an injection that suppresses ovulation), birth control pills, Delestrogen Injections, and Progesterone Injections. It is important to remember that each fertility clinic with have a slightly different protocol than other clinics, but ultimately the doctors are the experts and know what they are doing to give you the very best shot at becoming pregnant and it is crucial you follow their lead through this step of the process and we will be there to cheer you on and answer any questions that come up throughout. You will also be subject to blood tests and ultrasounds before the embryo transfer, which monitor your medications and your uterine lining. All of these medications and appointments will be outlines on a medication calendar that the fertility clinic will provide you.
It’s Transfer Time!
The actual transfer is usually one of the most exciting parts of the surrogacy journey. It is the beginning of your journey of carrying a perfect baby for incredible people, and what can beat that feeling?! As mentioned earlier, the surrogate will undergo the procedure of the actual embryo transfer to become pregnant. Imagine a pap smear and a vaginal ultrasound all combined into one, that is close to what the embryo transfer will entail. The procedure is quick and painless. After the embryo has been transferred to your uterus…. we wait! You will be on bed rest up to 3 days following the embryo transfer. You normally will travel to wherever your intended parents embryos are located for the embryo transfer and arrive a day before transfer and then stay through the course of transfer and bedrest. You will continue to follow your medication calendar and again you will follow any and all advice the clinic has to offer. On day eight and ten after the embryo transfer your hCG levels will be checked via a blood draw and your doctor will call you with results to let you know whether or not you are pregnant. If hCG levels rise to the appropriate level, then a heartbeat confirmation ultrasound will take place around the 6-8 weeks of being pregnant.
The Pregnancy
During the pregnancy phase of the surrogacy journey you will attend your regular doctor appointments. I always recommend that whatever relationship naturally evolves between you and your intended parents is what makes the process go smoothly. You will have certain expectations that are outlined in the surrogacy contract on communication that is absolutely necessary, but the rest is all about communication between both parties. Some intended parents may want to accompany you to every doctors appointment, while other may FaceTime for the bigger appointments but not the rest. The biggest take away is that communication is key and that relationships between all parties is productive and healthy. This is the exciting part of the process where you get to grow a beautiful human for a deserving family and how many people get to experience something that incredible?! Again, our agency will be with you every step of the way to ensure a stress free journey.
Counseling and Psych Evaluations
As a proven surrogate and a nurse I understand the importance of mental health on a daily basis and even more so when navigating a journey as complex as surrogacy, which is why Healing Hearts Surrogacy has partnered with Southwest Behavioral Health Consultants PLLC to offer mental health services in a variety of ways. Gestational Carriers are required to have an up-to-date psychiatric evaluation for clearance prior to the scheduled transfer date. Psychiatric evaluations will remain valid for one year. The psychiatric evaluation will not be released to the intended parents or any entity without written consent from the gestational carrier other than Healing Hearts Surrogacy.
Southwest Behavioral Health Consultants PPLC also offers optional counseling services available to Gestational Carriers during their journey and up to three months after birth, per intended parents/gestational carrier contract agreement. If a GC wishes to continue with services outside of the range and funding from the IP. Southwest Behavioral Health Consultants operates as an independent private practice and can continue treatment outside of this agreement.
What can you expect from a mental health evaluation?
Becoming a Gestational Carrier is a life-changing and beautiful decision to help another person become a parent, that should be made with great consideration. The purpose of an evaluation is to discuss the aspects of your decision, assess your comfortability and preparedness with the journey and post-journey of delivery. During the evaluation, topics include:
Reason for becoming a surrogate
Your feelings toward pregnancy, risks, side-effects
Your support system and expectations
Mental Health History
Substance use history
Current emotional state
Mental Status Exam
The evaluation is intended to help both the Gestational Carrier and the Intended Parents feel comfortable and supported in this decision. This is seen as an opportunity for Gestational Carrier’s to discuss your feelings, talk openly about any concerns or fears, and prepare for any challenges you may face. There is no wrong or right answers, this is not an interview, it is a time for you to be honest and up front to help support your journey. All evaluations will be performed by one of Southwest Behavioral Health Consultants licensed counselors or psychiatrists (MD).
Take the jump, we promise its worth it!
To start your surrogacy journey navigate over to our CONTACT US page and fill out the request form. We will then contact you to introduce our agency more in depth so you can decide for yourself if you would like to work with us. If we agree to work together then you will be sent more information that will complete your surrogate profile so that you can begin matching with potential intended parents.